


I'd crawl out of my skin! (And so would you)

by theladylabyrinth



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Alice Cooper (Archie Comics) is the Worst, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Body Image, Comforting!Jughead, Eating Disorders, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, protective!jughead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-10
Updated: 2018-02-15
Packaged: 2019-03-16 10:05:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13634076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theladylabyrinth/pseuds/theladylabyrinth
Summary: Alice's family breakfasts start to catch up to Betty, and Jughead is there to help keep her from falling into old, unhealthy habits.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I originally had this idea for a Sprousehart fic, but it didn't feel genuine to write about Lili, and the Carrie Musical seemed like the perfect opportunity. From there, it spiraled out of control. It's my first Bughead fic so please enjoy and comment!

**Chapter 1**

  
Betty inhaled deeply as she approached the tiny, windowless green room that housed the costumes for Carrie: The Musical, which was being put on by Riverdale High’s drama department. Veronica, in addition to playing one of the main characters in the play, had teamed up to be in charge of the costume department with Kevin.

  
Betty knew that, as her best friend, Veronica would never have an unkind word to say about her or her body. However, considering she is one of the thinnest, sexiest and most confident women she knew, Betty felt incredibly self conscious about going into the costume closet and having Veronica fit her for her Sue Snell outfits, especially considering the few pounds that Betty had put on over the past couple of weeks.

  
She glanced at her phone and saw a text from Jughead, asking her to meet at Pop’s after her fitting to discuss the article he was writing to promote the show in the Blue and Gold. Her stomach turned and she stashed her phone without responding before lifting her chin and walking into the green room behind the stage to be fitted.  
“Hey B!” Veronica smiled warmly as she greeted Betty and started gushing about all the ideas she had for Betty’s character and measuring from her shoulder to her fingertip, her hip to the floor, and then around her bust, thighs, hips, and waist. She was so busy talking that she almost didn’t notice the uneasy look on Betty’s face and her strained smile until Betty flinched when Veronica’s spindly fingers brushed her belly button.

  
“B? What’s wrong?”

  
Betty feigned confusion as Veronica let the measuring tape fall and looked at her with concern.

  
“Nothing, V. I’m just really overwhelmed with Carrie on top of my schoolwork and being back on the Blue and Gold. And my mom has been forcing Chic and I to sit down every morning for these nightmare-ish family breakfasts, my dad has been staying at a ShareBnB downtown for weeks, and I still haven’t cracked the mystery that is my long lost brother. I guess I’ve just been a little on edge lately, but I’m fine, I promise.”

  
Veronica smiled sympathetically and reached up to smooth Betty’s ponytail. “Trust me, B. I hear you about having your dad out of the picture, even temporarily. And your mom will chill with the breakfasts once things settle into normalcy.”

  
_Yeah and then I’ll be back to being shoved out the door with a salad in one hand for lunch and a slimfast in the other hand for breakfast_ , thought Betty. But outwardly, she just let out a small giggle and a reassuring nod. Veronica seemed satisfied, and had written all of Betty’s measurements down, so she made Betty promise to join her for mani/pedis and sangria Friday afternoon, and turned to start adjusting the dressform to match Betty’s shape. As Betty pulled her sweater back over her camisole, she took advantage of Veronica’s distraction and took a quick picture of the measurements of her body that Veronica had jotted down in her notebook.

  
Once she slipped out of the green room and back into the hall, she ducked into a nearby bathroom and pulled out her phone to examine her measurements. It had been a while since she had measured her body, but she still had the numbers burned into her mind from a few months before. Granted, that had been during her and Jughead’s breakup and she had barely been able to stomach food during that time due to the anxiety that crippled her. However, she couldn’t help but fret over the inches that had been added to each part of her body.

  
Alice’s voice rang in her ears, chiding her for skipping her early morning runs and letting her empty calorie consumption get away from her.

  
Betty glanced at the toilet before shaking her head, taking a deep breath, and rushing out of the bathroom like she was running from a demon.

 

And maybe she was.

 

The bell dinged above her head as she hesitantly pushed open the door to Pop’s. Her eye was immediately drawn to the crown beanie in the corner, perched above a face that glowed blue from his laptop screen, which she knew better than she knew her own no matter how many hours she spent scrutinizing it in the mirror.

  
Jughead glanced up at the sound of the bell, and the smile that cracked his hardened facade made her forget every insecurity she had ever felt for just a moment. Then, his eyes raked over her body and she missed the hungry look they held and instead all her energy was suddenly focused on becoming as small as possible. Her face fell almost imperceptibly, her shoulders hunched, and her arms instinctively wrapped across her middle before she slipped behind the protective barrier of the table that sat in front of the worn red booth.

  
Jughead’s brows knit together as Betty attempted to hide herself from him, but he couldn’t ask her what was going on before she launched a little too enthusiastically into the conversation they needed to have about his Blue and Gold write up for the play. They hashed out all the details about the article, as well as some of his ideas for his documentary, including scheduling his interview with Betty, before he realized that Betty had not ordered so much as a milkshake since she had arrived.  
“Can I get you dinner, Betts? You must be starving.”

  
“No, Veronica and I grabbed a bite after my fitting.” Betty was shocked as the lie slipped off her own tongue. She hadn’t even given a second thought before lying to Jughead. The lies she told her mom about why her door was locked, what she had eaten for lunch that day, that she spent the night at the Pembrooke instead of Sunnyside, came like second nature to her these days. But this was the first lie she had told Jughead since they reconciled.

  
However, as she calculated the calories in a milkshake, fries, onion rings, or a burger and added them to the blueberry pancakes with syrup, orange juice, bacon, and eggs Alice had practically force fed her for breakfast, her heartbeat slowed and her brain settled into an easiness about the lie. It was certainly better than the alternative, right?  
Her genuine smile comforted Jughead for now, but he made a mental note to keep an eye on Betty. Something seemed off about her and now that he had her back, he was never going to let her suffer alone again.

  
Jughead dropped Betty off at the end of her block, gave her a lingering kiss with his hand scrunched in the hem of her cardigan, and watched her with a dark gaze until her ponytail disappeared around the corner as she turned down the walkway to her front door. He had purposely taken the long way to her neighborhood, partially because he knew the freedom she felt with the wind on her face, but more selfishly because he wasn’t ready for her arms to release their grasp around his middle. She had seemed more relaxed after their long ride across town, so he was able to go home without the heaviness of his concern for her weighing him down.

  
He slept peacefully that night with the scent of her perfume on the back of his shirt, and her satisfied, relaxed hums replaying in his ear.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't exactly know how scheduling updates works but...I was done so...here it is? Please drop me a comment to let me know what you think!

**Chapter 2**

Betty woke the next morning and hit the snooze button one too many times (again). The spring semester always left her schedule too full, and her sleep schedule just could not keep up with the amount of energy she was expected to give to everything around her. She quickly got dressed, tied her hair up, and went downstairs. 

Just as her hand was about to land on the doorknob for a quick getaway, she heard a shrill voice call out her name, the attempt failing to come across as cheerful and bright.

“Elizabeth!” What are you thinking leaving this house without sitting down to breakfast with your brother and I? I made chocolate chip pancakes!”

“I already told you I don’t like chocolate chip pancakes.” Betty’s stomach roiled as she looked over the table, which was littered with pancakes, hash browns, sticky sweet maple syrup, orange juice, flavored coffee creamers, and berries that had been doused with powdered sugar.

“Well you can’t go off to school with nothing in your stomach. You need your strength to keep your resume Ivy-league ready!” 

Betty rolled her eyes at her mother’s ability to pretend that she was a normal mother sending a normal daughter off to a normal school in a normal town. A quick glance at the spot where just weeks before she had helped her mother mop up an obscene amount of blood had Chic and Alice both casting their eyes downward, before Alice’s raked back up Betty’s body with a scrutinizing and dark gaze. Betty instantly wished she had continued out the door despite her mother’s insistence, rather than being subjected to her not-so-quiet judgement. 

“Why haven’t you been wearing the new skirts I bought you?”

Betty’s fists clenched at the question and her mind flashed back to the image of herself a few days ago, standing in front of her full-length mirror, staring with tears in her eyes at the gaping space where her milky skin showed between the teeth of the skirt’s zipper. 

Back in the present, Alice tapped her foot and crossed her arms.

“Well, Elizabeth?”

“I didn’t like them.”

“Don’t be foolish! Those skirts were expensive and the exact same style as the ones you wear every day. You should be grateful for them, especially since what you’re wearing is starting to look so worn and dull. Now turn around, put on a new skirt, and throw that one in the donation box in the basement.”

“I can’t.”

Alice let out a humorless laugh. “And why not, young lady?”

“Because you’ve been force feeding me carbs, sugar, and fat every day for two weeks now and none of the damn skirts fit, okay?!”

The horror on Alice’s face exceeded that which she had worn when dumping the shady man’s body in the drainpipe. She stared at Betty for a few seconds before stepping close, lowering her voice, and snarling, “If I have managed to eat the same breakfast as you for the last two weeks and not gain an inch, you have no excuse. What about River Vixen practice? And your early morning runs? There’s no reason you can’t eat a balanced breakfast and still maintain your figure, Elizabeth. Maybe you should spend more of your energy on being active instead of joyriding on that monstrous death trap with your boyfriend.”

As the skin split on Betty’s palms, her emotions released and she spun on her heels, speeding from the house and slamming the door behind her. The sun was barely above the horizon, and she was thankful Jughead hadn’t arrived yet to walk her to school. She ran all the way across town to the high school, and didn’t stop until she was in the girls’ locker room. 

She burst into a stall and heaved over the toilet, but nothing came out. She realized this was because she hadn’t eaten since the smoothie she had for lunch yesterday. Her brain buzzed with numbers as she counted her pulse, calculated her heart rate, and then multiplied the miles she had run to school by the typical amount of calories she burned per mile at that pace. Once that number was flashing in her head, she began to take deep breaths until she felt steady enough to stand and wash her hands in the sink.

She smoothed her ponytail back into place, dabbed concealer under her eyes, and freshened her mascara before turning at a few different angles in the mirror with her hands around her waist. Satisfied enough to leave the protection of the bathroom, she breathed deeply one more time and headed out the door where she abruptly stopped at the sight of Jughead leaned against the wall opposite the girls’ locker room. He looked up at her and quickly approached to grab her hand and kiss her forehead. He held her neck in his signature protective gesture, and used his thumb to tilt her face up so that her eyes met his. 

“Are you okay? Cheryl said she saw you run into the bathroom and that you looked upset. I didn’t mean to be creepy by waiting for you, but I wanted to make sure you were ok before I went to homeroom.” 

Betty smiled her first genuine smile of the day at Jughead’s concern, and assured him that she was fine now, and that her rush had been nothing more than a feminine emergency.

He looked down at her, relieved, and Betty felt another pang of guilt as she let more lies escape her. Before her mind could spiral any further and her fingers could curl into her palm, the bell rang and he hurried her off to class with a light peck, a gentle pat to her butt, and a promise to meet her for lunch at the Blue and Gold.

 

Betty showed up to said lunch empty-handed, and took her seat beside Jughead on the ratty old couch where he already sat, shoveling cafeteria chicken nuggets and tater tots into his mouth. 

His mouth full, he looked Betty up and down, looked all around her, and then swallowed before asking innocently, “Where’s your lunch?”

“Oh! I left it at home this morning. But it’s no big deal, Alice had pancakes AND omelettes this morning so I’m still pretty full.” Betty added a tally in the “Lies I’ve told Jughead this week” column next to the “calories eaten/burned” columns in her head, and quickly covered the disappointment she felt in herself with a smile. 

Jughead only smirked mischievously and replied, “well then it’s a good thing I came prepared,” as he supplied a clear plastic takeaway box from his backpack, along with a fork, napkin, and two packets of caesar dressing.

Betty first smiled at Jughead’s generosity, then did a quick estimate of the calories in the salad he had brought her. She poured half of one of the dressing packets over the meal, and decided that she would hide most of the chicken under a few leaves of lettuce. She sat back and ate happily as Jughead started talking about the latest developments of his documentary around mouthfuls of carbs and ketchup, and didn’t realize she had eaten her whole salad until the bell rang and it was time to go to her next class. 

She decided not to panic, because she had River Vixen practice that afternoon anyway and she could just make sure she went extra hard. Her next thought was that she hadn’t heard Alice’s voice in her head since she had arrived at the Blue and Gold office, and she smiled as she ran her fingers over her rough palms. She realized that it was almost as if she could feel her scars healing. Which scars, she wasn’t sure, but it was a good feeling. 


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Betty stood in the end zone of the Riverdale High football field, the April sun reflecting off of the turf causing her to sweat more profusely than usual. She wiped her forehead and gritted her teeth to keep pushing herself through the routine for Friday's game. Cheryl stood on the goal line, snapping her fingers and counting at the top of her lungs as the cheerleaders blocked their routine, running through each motion without music to make sure that no one was practicing incorrectly.

When Cheryl was finally satisfied, she walked to the amplifier that sat next to the goal post to start blasting their cheer song, arranged and recorded by the Pussycats. 

Betty realized as she stood still, waiting for the music to start, that the field, the football players, and the foot she was waiting to catch in her hands on the third count had all disappeared. Nothing but the sun remained in her field of vision and even that started to fade as everything spun and suddenly she was held in two slim yet small arms, and she heard a firm, distant voice declaring that it was time for a break.

Her feet moved somehow as she was pulled towards the back of the bleachers and, in the cool shade with water pouring over her lips, her brain started to register the voice of her best friend cooing at her that it was going to be ok, she texted Jughead, and she was “...going to KILL Cheryl. How dare she put us through this to the point that people are passing out like she’s some kind of SLAVE DRIVER. I swear to God I will smack the red right out of her hair…” Betty panicked when she heard that Jughead had been called, not wanting him to see her like this and put two and two together after lunch this afternoon. 

However, she didn’t have the energy to protest, and even if she had, she would’ve had no time because by the time she finished the thought, her senses were awakened by the familiar scent of cigarette smoke and sandalwood, slightly tinged by sweat, and her boyfriend’s husky, worried voice was in her ear telling her that she was ok, he was here, she was safe now.

He didn’t want to hold her face like he usually did, for fear of her further overheating, so he held her hands in his and pressed soft kisses to her delicate, shaking fingers. Just as Betty opened her eyes and they met Jughead’s, he ran his fingers over her palms in a way that Veronica wouldn’t have noticed, but Betty froze as she knew exactly what he was doing. His voice caught in his throat as his blue eyes became glazed with tears, and he swallowed thickly to avoid letting them spill over. 

Her eyes held a thousand apologies, and he only shook his head imperceptibly to let her know that it was ok. He loved her. He was here. And they would figure it out together.  

From beneath the bleachers, Jughead led Betty to Archie’s truck, which he had asked to borrow so that Betty wouldn’t be in danger trying to hold herself up on his motorcycle after her heat stroke. 

She rode the whole way home with her fingers laced through his and her head leaned against the cool glass of the window. When they got to her block, Jughead parked the truck in the Andrews’ driveway, and walked around to the other side where he pulled Betty into his arms and carried her across the yard to her porch.

He stood her on her feet in front of the door and held her face between his cool palms. “Baby, I need you to listen to me, ok? I need you to walk into your house, figure out where your mom is, and tell her that you aren’t feeling well, and you’re going straight to bed. Can you do that for me, Betts?”

Betty nodded her head weakly and he kissed her lips firmly to let her know he would be waiting just outside. She stepped inside and mustered enough energy to convince her mom that she was simply tired and under the weather, then quietly knocked three times on the door so that Jughead would know that the coast was clear.

With unparalleled speed, he made it around the house and up the ladder to Betty’s window, which he opened on his own, knowing she didn’t have the strength. She already lay on the bed, so he walked to where she was and pulled her weak frame into his arms, cradling her close to his body.

“Betts... What happened?”

“It was just too much, Juggie. It was too hot and it had been two hours of Vixens practice and I didn’t have enough water. I just need to shower and rehydrate and sleep.”

Jughead said nothing more, just carried her to the bathroom that connected to her bedroom, where he sat her on the counter and began pulling her Vixen shirt and shorts off of her, followed by her sweaty sports bra, and finally her panties, which she flicked off her toe after they fell past her knees and to the floor. 

Betty leaned against Jughead for support, feeling the length of his fully clothed body against her naked one, but not aware enough to feel either aroused or self-conscious. All she felt was raw love as she let herself be vulnerable and fully put herself in Jughead’s protective hands. He rinsed her body first with lukewarm water, careful not to let her body temperature rise anymore than it already had that day. 

He slowly lathered her body with her chamomile body wash, which he knew she used when she needed to relax her nerves. Once she was clean and cooled off and like jelly in his strong arms, he used a cup to rinse her body and hair before wrapping her in a towel and rubbing away the droplets of water so she wouldn’t get too cold. 

Betty was more aware now and seemed somewhat rejuvenated by the bath, so he ran her a cup of cool water from the tap and handed it to her so that she could hydrate her tired body. 

“You should probably eat something too, Betts. I could climb down and go grab you something from Archie’s if you-”

“No! I mean, no thanks Jug. I had plenty at lunch and I think I’m just going to go to bed.”

Jughead seemed taken aback at first, but relaxed and agreed that she needed her rest. He led her to the bed where he waited for her to dress in the flannel he had left on the dresser and his favorite pair of cheeky panties. It was only as he watched her body move in the light from her window that he realized he could see more of her ribs than usual, and her hipbones seemed to protrude just slightly too much. 

She turned around to his furrowed brow, unaware of how thin her body looked to him, and snuggled into his side where she fell asleep before her head was even nestled into the crook of his arm. He was glad he had made her drink the whole glass of water before she left the bathroom, but he locked the images of her body in his mind so that he could keep track and make sure that Betty was taking care of herself in all the chaos that was her life.

After the sun went down and Betty’s breaths had long evened out, Jughead descended the ladder and made his way back to the school parking lot where his motorcycle still sat. Exhausted himself, he didn’t have much time to dwell on his concerns for Betty before his own eyes closed as his head hit his pillow on the Southside, far away from Betty’s seemingly perfect world in the North.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

 

The next morning when Betty woke up alone, she didn’t hit the snooze button once. Alice’s voice from the morning before, along with Cheryl’s shrill and meaningless, degrading shouting at River Vixens practice had her out of bed and in her tennis shoes before the sun came up. After eating one of her mom’s weightloss bars for some energy, Betty set out down her street, and by the time she reached the Southside, her lungs and legs were burning deliciously, and she stopped at the edge of Sunnyside trailer park to take her pulse and then take a short cooldown walk to catch her breath before she ascended the steps to the Jones’ trailer. 

Betty knocked cheerfully, and chuckled when F.P. answered the door with a grunt and a lazy motion over his shoulder for her to come in. Jughead was out of bed, but hadn’t made it far before he had crashed on the couch in a caffeine-less slump. Betty’s smile grew and she sing-songed a spritely “Good morning!” to him, to which he responded with a grunt and a half-hearted attempt at flipping her the bird. F.P. had shuffled to the kitchen table and flopped across the smooth expanse of its top, and Betty bit her lip to hold in a quip about the Jones men and her role as an enabler of their sluggish morning habits. 

Betty set about making them a pot of coffee, and by the time she was pouring pancake batter on the griddle, both of the dark-haired men were upright and conversing as though their trailer had not resembled a TB ward when she had arrived. 

After flipping the pancakes and ensuring that each side was a perfect golden brown, Betty served each man with a plate stacked high and doused in syrup, and took a seat between them with nothing but a cup of coffee with skim milk in front of her. 

Jughead and F.P. exchanged a confused glance and then both cast the same befuddled look at Betty.

“What?” She said defensively, checking her shirt for splattered batter, and her hair for flyaways. “What is it?”

“Betts...why aren’t you eating any pancakes?”

“Oh!” She replied, somewhat relieved. “I had a protein bar before my run.”

“You ran here?!” both serpents chorused as they dropped their forks. They started rambling about how she needed sustenance for that kind of physical activity, and they began to bustle about getting Betty a plate and utensils, each of them piling pancakes from their own plates onto hers.

“Whoa, whoa, guys! Don’t project that Jones appetite onto me! I will share in a couple of these but please take the rest of them back,” she said sternly.

They each reluctantly stabbed two of her pancakes with their forks, and proceeded to eat them with abandon as Betty smiled and daintily cut into the two soft cakes on her plate, avoiding as much of the maple syrup as possible.

“You know, it wouldn’t kill you to put a little meat on those bones anyway, little Coop.”

Before Jughead could chide his dad for commenting on Betty’s body, his head whipped around to face Betty at her response of, “I hardly think that’s something I need, Mr. Jones.” 

“Betty…..” Jughead gaped at her as the room fell silent, and Betty seemed to realize that Jughead was starting to put the pieces together from lunch and River Vixens practice the day before.

She quickly stood up and frantically started going on about how she would never make it to school on time if she didn’t get home to shower, and hurried out the door with a quick kiss for Jughead, leaving both him and his dad utterly confused in her wake, staring at the pancake and a half that was left in a puddle of syrup on her plate.

  
  


For the rest of the day, Jughead barely had a chance to even get a glimpse of Betty, let alone try to talk to her about what had happened that morning, and what had been going on with her for the past few days. 

He showed up at the Blue and Gold to meet with her for their usual lunch date, but as he arrived, she was swiping a stack of papers from the printer and hurrying off to submit her writing on the chemistry of diet soda and their effects on bone structure to professor Flutesnoot. He took a quick survey of the room and saw no evidence of a meal eaten during Betty’s lunch hour, and he became increasingly nervous. 

He sent Betty a text, asking if he could take her to Pop’s for a milkshake after school since they had been missing each other all day. 

When she responded in the affirmative, Jughead headed towards biology and spent the whole class thinking about how to approach a very sensitive topic with his beautiful girlfriend. 

 

While Jughead was in biology trying to figure out exactly what was going on with his beauty, she was avoiding her own eyes in the mirror of the girls’ dressing room as she changed clothes for Carrie rehearsal. Veronica had Betty’s first costume ready, and because it was the one for the scene she was rehearsing today, Ronnie wanted her to go ahead and try it on so she could work out any issues with it.

Betty slipped the 80’s prom dress over her head. She looked down at herself and marveled at how Veronica had taken the concept of too much tulle and puffy sleeves, and turned it into something that wasn’t completely hideous. However, her wondering at this marvel ceased immediately when she realized that the zipper still had teeth that weren’t clasped. Her breaths shortened as she tried relentlessly to shrink her ribs and flatten her chest so that the sides of the dress would meet all the way at the top. 

Her stomach clenched and she heard Alice’s words in her head.  _ What about River Vixens practice? What about your morning runs? You have no excuse. _

Veronica and Kevin barged in without knocking to see Betty red-faced and struggling with her hands behind her back. Veronica gasped as she took in the scene and immediately apologized, because she “obviously wrote the measurements down wrong! I am such an idiot. Kevin, I told you I needed you there with me instead of gallivanting around the Southside with Fangs. I swear, I am such a space cadet. I’m so sorry, Betty. I can let these seams out before the next rehearsal.” 

Betty nodded and asked them to leave so she could get back into her regular rehearsal clothes, when really she needed to wipe her tears away, along with the blood from her hands. Her mind sped through everything she had eaten this week and every break she shouldn’t have taken at River Vixens practice. 

Late for her first scene already, Betty chugged half of her bottle of water and shook the dizziness and fog from her mind before steeling herself to face her classmates under the unforgiving lights of the stage.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow and interact with me on Tumblr @theladylabyrinth  
> And please comment! I hope you enjoyed the update! <3


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

 

Jughead waited outside the door that he knew was closest to the school auditorium, a toothpick dangling from his mouth. She finally emerged, dressed once again in the clothes she had worn to school, her backpack secured on her back and ready for the ride to Pop’s. He mounted his motorcycle and held it steady as Betty settled in behind him. Before he handed her helmet over, his hand reached behind him to stroke her thigh just below the hem of her skirt and give it a light squeeze, but his face darkened in confusion and anger as Betty cringed away from his touch before she realized what she was doing. 

“Betty,” he turned to look deeply into her eyes, not pulling his hand from her thigh, but holding it tighter instead. He wasn’t about to let her pull away from him as he had done from her more times than he cared to think about. 

He saw fear flash across her eyes, along with guilt about recoiling from the only touch that had ever comforted her. She cast her eyes downward and he reached up to gingerly hold her chin and pull her eyes up to meet his. She expected to see anger and betrayal in them, but she only saw softness and concern. 

“Betty, what is going on? I know you haven’t been honest with me and I’m worried about you. Please let me in, love.” His vulnerable eyes pleaded with her as he gently stroked her cheek with his thumb, and suddenly a dam burst in her chest.

Jughead had seen every part of her. He had seen her scars, both physical and emotional, he had wiped her tears, he had sunken evidence of a murder with her and had held her as the tension left her shoulders and she let her exhaustion consume her later that night. He had seen every inch of her body, been inside her, learned what made her moan and cry his name, and what her skin tasted like after he filled her with himself. 

As Betty’s mind raced through all the ways that Jughead knew her, it shifted to think of all the ways she knew him. He admitted to her his lowest moment of resorting to violence out of his desperation to protect everything that mattered to him as he felt it all slipping away. She had reassured him in his most vulnerable moment when he was unsure of his ability as her lover and he had shoved aside his worst fears of abandonment and rejection to let her into the depths of his heart where his deepest insecurities lie. Everything went blank as she closed her eyes and behind her eyelids all she saw was the look on his face that day as she had cradled his cheek and he leaned into her touch, giving her all of himself much in the way he had the night before.

Her eyes snapped open and through the blur of her tears, she saw the same expression on Jughead’s face, now tinged with worry as he patiently waited for her to be ready to share with him what had her so troubled. He didn’t press her to come out with it. He only sat in the same twisted position on the motorcycle, one hand still reassuringly stroking the soft skin of her thigh, the other holding her neck protectively; his rough thumb gently stroked her cheek to keep her tears from reaching her sweet, pink pout. 

She leaned into him and felt the weight of the pressure that she had been under since she brought Chic home crush her. 

“Juggie, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry I’ve lied to you. It didn’t seem that bad at the time, and I swear it was out of self defense, but I should’ve realized that I wasn’t under attack from you. I was under attack from myself and my mother and Cheryl and I’ve just been under so much pressure since Chic moved in and the shady man and all the pancakes and French toast and omelettes and orange juice and...and….Jughead, I’m so sorry. I just needed control over something and this was the only thing I could find that felt like I was in control. I’m so sorry, Juggie.”

Jughead didn’t understand half of what Betty was talking about, but he could see that she was spiraling and she needed him. He swung his leg off the motorcycle and stood next to Betty where he sealed his lips to her forehead and she curled her hands into his chest. He felt tears sting his eyes as her body shook in his arms with the release that she hadn’t allowed herself for days, hell, maybe even weeks. 

He gently pulled back, wrapped both his big hands around the back of her neck, and used his thumbs to tilt her face up toward his again. Rather than hide her gaze as she had done several times over the past few days, Betty looked into Jughead’s eyes and opened up to let him see the pain she had been suffering at the hands of her own self-doubt. 

Every plan Jughead had concocted about what to say to Betty in this moment suddenly seemed absolutely ridiculous and cliche. Betty was no ordinary woman, and this was no ordinary relationship they shared. He knew that the love of his life needed more than just reassuring words to ease her pain. Suddenly, he knew what he had to do to help his girlfriend heal from these wounds. 

He held her until her hiccups and quiet sobs subsided, whispering low in her ear about how she had nothing to be sorry for and that he loved her “more than life itself, beautiful girl.” 

Then, as she dried the last of her tears, he gave her one last gentle kiss, handed her helmet to her, and said, “Come on. I have somewhere to take you.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Betty clung tight around Jughead’s middle, her fingers tracing his top two abs (heavily, so as not to tickle him while he drives). They sped down the highway along Sweetwater River and she only wondered where they were going in the back of her mind. Other than that, all she cared about was the wind on her face and legs and blowing through the plaid sherpa jacket she was wearing. 

They passed through the Southside, and past Greendale until Betty had no idea where they were anymore, but she couldn’t have cared less as she lifted her left hand to let it dance in the wind as a smile crossed her face and she felt Jughead chuckle lightly, the sound traveling through her arms and into her chest where it reverberated in her heart and from there it shone out of her face like rays of sunshine. 

Finally, they turned off of the highway and onto a dirt road that wound through the woods, and eventually, back to Sweetwater River. Jughead parked his motorcycle by a sign that read “The Snakehole” and Betty stood back, staring hesitantly at the sign. When Jughead turned around and saw her face, he smiled impishly and reached for her hand while muttering “Keeps the tourists out.”

Just as she had followed him two towns from Riverdale and to this cliff’s edge, she followed him down a steep stone staircase that led through a tunnel of tree branches that filtered the sunlight to make it look like they were inside a giant green kaleidoscope. Betty marveled at the movement of the light, and Jughead marveled at Betty’s long legs, which extended from cut-off denim shorts as he held both her hands to help her down a particularly treacherous stretch of steps. He caught her eyes with his and smirked devilishly, and she just tossed her head back with a melodic giggle. 

Finally, they reached the bottom of the stairs and as she hopped down the final and tallest step, she gasped when she looked up from her bleached white keds. Before her stood a vast, trickling waterfall, whose tinkling music was syncopated with the chirp of the birds that flew above. Tears spilled from Betty’s eyes as she took in the beauty around her, and she turned to Jughead who was staring at her with an open, vulnerable expression that she couldn’t quite read. She saw adoration there, but something else. Not quite worry, but something that resembled it. She cocked her head to the side as she tried to read his eyes, but he just stepped forward and took her hands in his once again. 

“Betts. You and I are here, together, after going through more stress and fear and turmoil in these past several months than most people do in a lifetime. The past few weeks have been both the happiest of my life because I’ve had you back again, and some of the scariest. Because not only did we cover up a murder together and lose our virginity to each other, but you’ve spent days in a raging battle with yourself that I was completely oblivious to. And it breaks my heart that I couldn’t be there for you.”

“Jughead, you couldn’t have kn-”

He silenced her by pressing a finger to her lips.

“Just listen, Betty. I know I couldn’t have known, but I swore to myself the night I first made love to you that neither of us would never suffer alone again. And even if it wasn’t my fault, I hate that you had to suffer without me there. And I never want that to happen again. Ever. I didn’t want to just tell you that you were beautiful and perfect the way you are or offer to go on runs with you or any of the usual dumb shit that guys do for their girlfriends when they don’t feel confident. I had to show you just how absolutely, angelically stunning you are to me and I can’t imagine any better place to do that than here. I want to spend the day with you, completely free together, with no doubts or fears, and letting you know that you are incredible and I am always here with you no matter what, Betts. I love you so much.”

Betty couldn’t feel her feet touching the ground. She felt like her hands were floating instead of being held up by his, and everything that surrounded Jughead’s face in her field of vision was a complete blur of green leaves and blue sky and sunshine, and she wept the happiest tears she had ever shed in her life. This magical place, the kind of place she pictured weeks before when they met at Pop’s in the midst of the Black Hood attacks and desired nothing more than to run away together, from all the secrets they were keeping from each other and everything that was unsaid between them, had become real.

She leaned forward to plant a kiss on his warm, soft lips, and his hands crept to her waist to pull the flowing hem of her shirt up her ribs and to her armpits, before she broke from his lips and nervously glanced around. 

“Jughead! What are you doing?! We’re outside, someone could see us!”

“Betty. Do you know what this place is?”

“Ummm...The Snakehole?”

Jughead chuckled. “Exactly. This is a Serpent hideout. Like I said, the sign is there to keep out tourists, and the townies know better than to set foot here. If a Serpent comes by to hang out, they’ll see my motorcycle parked by the sign and they’ll know to stay away. Betty, we’re alone here. Completely alone. Free. I promise.”

Betty glanced around again, hesitantly biting her lip and he could see the gears of worry turning in her head.

He leaned forward to press his lips to her pulse point and suck lightly before whispering in a low husky voice in her ear “Do you trust me, baby?”

Betty’s vision blurred as she felt her blood rushing beneath his lips and she whimpered before nodding weakly.

His hands reached back down to the hem of her shirt, where he pulled it up and over her head. She reached down to unfasten his jeans and he wiggled them down his legs where he could step out of them. Her shorts were next, falling easily down her slim legs once they were over her hips and perfect ass, and then she pulled his shirt up over his head. 

They stood together, two nervous teenagers in the most beautiful place they had ever seen, in their underwear, letting all their walls and insecurities and fears fall away as they undressed each other. 

Betty seemed nervous and was obviously hesitant to fully undress, so Jughead assured her that they had all the time in the world and could wait until she was fully comfortable. At that, she smiled and ducked her head bashfully before unfastening her bra and letting it fall to her feet, followed by her cheeky lace underwear. 

Jughead grinned widely at the sight of his girlfriend letting go completely and letting herself be free with him in ways she had never and would never with anyone else. 

They spent the rest of the day basking in the sun, whispering all their most honest feelings to each other, and making love in the water, in the grass, under the waterfall, and everywhere else that was comfortable. When the sun finally began to set and Jughead noticed that Betty was starting to shiver, they dried off, dressed, and ascended the stairs (which was a little more difficult for Betty than Jughead after the day’s most popular activity). Jughead helped her as much as he could, every time with a cheeky, shit-eating grin and a playful smack on the arm from his girlfriend. 

Straddling the motorcycle was even more difficult, so he stood by her side until she was comfortable, slipping his jacket back on her arms and holding her close to keep her warm, kissing her all over her face and neck, telling her that this was the most incredible day of his life and how much he loved her and was so glad that they could have this together. She just nodded and hummed contentedly until finally, he released her to sit in front of her on the motorcycle. 

Before they took off, he turned around to place one more kiss on her helmet, and reached back to squeeze her thigh. This time, though, she leaned further into him and he relished in the warmth of her body against his, especially juxtaposed with her reaction to the same touch earlier in the day. In that moment, he knew his plan had worked and he smirked proudly. 

They sped back to Riverdale, bringing with them the freedom and confidence they had found together in the Snakehole. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the final chapter of my first Bughead fic. I hope you enjoyed it! Follow me on tumblr @theladylabyrinth

**Author's Note:**

> There will be more chapters to this, so I hope you keep reading!
> 
> Follow me on Tumblr @theladylabyrinth


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